You’ve done it. Made the big move your dream destination.
Whether for love or money, you’ve decided that this new country is home for a
little while. You’re just starting to get into your groove, when a nagging ache
for home starts cramping your style. Before long, this feeling has grown,
quickly spiralling into self-doubt. “Did I make the right decision?” “What am I
doing here?” “Could I fly home this weekend?”
We have all been there. Short of flying halfway round the
world just to smell the familiar air, BFSO recommends a few handy ways to
tackle the Expat Blues.
Be a Tourist!
Explore your surroundings as though you’re on vacation.
Sometimes, we can try so hard to create a “normal” life, that we forget it
doesn’t have to be! Finding work, schools, gyms and supermarkets is just one
half of really settling in. Seek out the
spectacular
– throw yourself into the experiences that your new town has to offer. Ask
around! Chances are your neighbours will be happy to introduce you to nooks and
crannies you’ve never explored. You might just fall in love with the place.
Taste of home
Create a little sanctuary of familiar things for when you
feel far away. This might seem like the complete opposite to the last piece of
advice, but there’s absolutely nothing wrong with finding familiar ways to feel
grounded. It could be as simple as a little photo collage of loved ones on the
wall, a British TV subscription, or the contents of your food cupboard.
The locally baked flat bread may never be your thing, and
that’s ok. Stick to crumpets, if that’s what
you’d prefer! Being open minded about your environment is about giving
everything a chance, but give yourself a break if you don’t always feel like
roaming from what you know.
Send a gift home.
Skype and FaceTime are life-savers, giving us instant access
to loved ones far away. Not to mention all the updates we get through Facebook
and Instagram, letting us know everyone is ok. What would we do without them? Still, nothing quite measures up to the good
old fashioned postal service.
There is something beautifully tangible about sending a gift
or letter via mail. That cuddly toy could be in your hands this weekend, and in
your niece’s cot by Wednesday. Gestures like these remind us that the world is
small, after all.
Stop keeping up with
everything at home!
Your mates are brunching at your favourite café, and you can
taste the avo toast through the screen. You double tap the photo bitterly, and
roll your eyes at the “wish you were here!” comments. You’re down with a serious
case of envy. Your symptoms are being exacerbated by the glaring screens of
social media.
Stay in touch, but
until you’re settled – stop reaching for the phone! You’ll find yourself
lamenting the conveniences you no longer have, or just the familiarity of
accents you don’t have to strain to understand each day.
We know. It’s not easy. Look, if you must compare, at least remember that nostalgia is a rose-tinted
lens. For each thing you miss about the UK, remember something you
don’t. Is there less traffic where you
live now? Better weather? Are people friendly?
Make some friends
The more you explore, the more likely you are to meet new
people. As time goes on, you’ll find yourself connecting with all kinds of
people you’d have never imagined come across. Give everyone a chance, even if
they’re not your “usual” type of person. You might learn something new.
You might find that you feel homesick because you have
dropped off an activity you used to do often before your big move. Did you used
to practise yoga? Play tennis often? Were you into fine dining? Why stop now?
Your hobbies are the
best way to
meet new people!
Go easy on yourself. Before long, you’ll probably stop
calling the UK “home”, because you’ll be content to stay right where you are.
Our loss!